Thursday, February 5, 2026

When Progress Feels Hard, Turn Your Struggles Into Strengths!

When Progress Feels Like It’s Falling Apart (For Both Ends of the Leash)

If you’ve ever thought, “We were doing so well… what happened?” this is for you.

One of the hardest moments in life with a dog is when progress seems to disappear overnight. The behaviors you thought were improving suddenly resurface. Emotions feel bigger. Training feels harder. And the doubt creeps in fast.

It’s discouraging. Confusing. And often deeply personal.

Here’s the truth most people don’t talk about: emotional disruption affects both ends of the leash.

When your dog’s nervous system is overwhelmed and your own emotions are running high, progress can temporarily look messy, even when you’re doing thoughtful, compassionate work.

Why “Backsliding” Happens (Even When You’re Trying So Hard)

Behavior change is not linear. It’s influenced by:

  • Stress and fatigue
  • Changes in environment or routine
  • Health, hormones, and development
  • Accumulated emotional load (for dogs and humans)

When your dog experiences a scare, prolonged stress, or a big life change, their coping skills can temporarily fall apart. At the same time, human frustration, worry, and disappointment quietly sneak in.

And those emotions matter.

Dogs are incredibly sensitive to:

  • Tension in our bodies
  • Changes in breathing and tone
  • Shifts in patience and expectations

When both nervous systems are dysregulated, training becomes harder and it’s easy to mistake emotional disruption for failure.

The Human Side of “It’s Getting Worse”


When progress feels lost, many dog owners start telling themselves:

  • I must be doing this wrong.
  • My dog will never get better.
  • We’re back at square one.
  • I don’t have it in me to keep trying.

That emotional weight can lead to:

  • Pushing too hard out of desperation
  • Avoiding training altogether
  • Giving up on plans that once felt hopeful
  • Feeling isolated, ashamed, or alone

None of this means you’re failing. It means you care deeply, and that matters!


Reframing Backsliding

What looks like regression is often:

  • A stress response
  • A sign your dog needs more support right now
  • A clue that emotional capacity has changed
  • A request to slow down, not stop

This is the moment where struggles can begin to transform into strengths if we respond with curiosity instead of panic. And that mindset shift is exactly what the Turning Struggles Into Strengths Membership is built to support.

A Different Kind of Training Space

Turning Struggles Into Strengths is for dog owners who see behavior as communication, not something to suppress or “fix.”

It’s for people who:

  • Value connection over control
  • Believe compassion and empathy belong in training
  • Want to understand why their dog behaves the way they do
  • Care about their dog’s emotional experience, not just outward behavior

Inside the membership, we focus on knowledge that builds confidence, not shortcuts:

  • Learning how dogs think, feel, and process the world
  • Developing skills you can use for life—not just one issue
  • Building awareness that helps you adapt when things feel hard

We also lean into learning through play:

  • Games that build impulse control, flexibility, and resilience
  • Training that feels collaborative and relationship-centered
  • Helping dogs want to participate, not comply under pressure

And we keep the big picture in mind; a full life with your dog:

  • Family outings and vacations
  • Community events
  • Camping, hiking, biking, and outdoor adventures
  • A dog who is a valued family member, not a project to manage

Most importantly, this is a space for support, not judgment.

  • Where struggle is normalized
  • Progress, big or small, is celebrated
  • Setbacks are part of the learning process
  • You don’t have to do this alone

If This Resonates…

If you’ve ever felt discouraged, stuck, or unsure, even while doing your best, you’re not broken, and neither is your dog. You may just need a space that helps you slow down, reframe, and build forward with compassion.

The Turning Struggles Into Strengths Membership is here to support you in that process; one thoughtful step at a time.

Join this February to receive 50% of your first month's membership with the code FEBLOVE!

The Turning Struggles Into Strengths Membership includes our Workshop Collection and additional bonus materials created to follow up after workshops. By joining in February you gain access to the Reframing & Redirection Workshop as part of your membership!

Use the code: FEBLOVE at checkout to receive 50% off the first month!

Because progress doesn’t disappear. Sometimes it just needs a different kind of support. 💛🐾

Sunday, February 1, 2026

How Emotions Shape What We See

February Focus on Behavior: How Emotions Shape What We See

Dog training isn’t just about following a plan or checking cues off a list. It’s about understanding what’s happening under the behavior. Every behavior we see is influenced by how our dog is feeling in that moment; safe or unsure, calm or overwhelmed, curious or frustrated.

When we focus only on outcomes, we miss important emotional information. But when we slow down and observe, behavior becomes feedback. Those small signals (changes in focus, movement, posture, or engagement) tell us when our dog is ready to learn and when their emotions are getting in the way.

By noticing how emotions impact behavior, we can adjust our training, protect confidence, and create experiences that support learning instead of stress.

Common Training Struggles & the Emotions Behind Them

1. Distractions & Environmental Overload

One of the most common challenges in training is distraction; but distraction is often emotional, not disobedience.

This time of year, Azul is all about bunny hunts. Bunnies visit our backyard almost every night under the cover of darkness, and by morning the scent picture is very exciting. The moment the gate opens and Azul is released to follow his nose, his arousal shoots way up. In that heightened emotional state, his ears are essentially “off.”

He’s not choosing to ignore me! His brain is fully occupied processing scent, movement, and anticipation. Once he checks his usual spots and realizes the bunnies have already moved on, his excitement naturally begins to drop.

To prevent unsafe bunny chases, Azul stays on leash or a tie-out during this high-arousal phase. I’m not waiting for obedience; I’m waiting for emotional regulation. When his body softens and he’s able to offer check-ins again, I know his brain is back online. That’s the moment I can safely reduce management and support more choices & freedoms.

This is what it looks like to work with emotions instead of fighting behavior; management first, learning second.

Dogs process the world through smell, sound, and movement. An environment that feels manageable one moment can become overwhelming the next. Watching how your dog emotionally responds to the environment helps you make better choices; using management tools such as a longline on a sniff-a-bout, increasing distance from overwhelming locations (where bunnies hide), or moving to a quieter space.

2. Pushing Too Far or Too Long

Emotions also shift when we ask for more than our dog can handle at the moment.

During mat work, for example, holding duration too long or repeating on/off cycles can turn calm focus into frustration or shutdown. On walks or in public spaces, stacking cues and distractions can push dogs, especially fearful or easily excited ones, past their emotional threshold.

Behaviors like yawning, lip-licking, stretching, disengaging, or wandering off are emotional signals. They’re your dog saying, “This is getting hard.” Responding early helps protect confidence and keeps learning positive.

When I’ve pushed Belle too far or asked for too much for too long, her vocal side shows up. She starts woo-wooing at me,not because she’s being “demanding,” but because frustration is creeping in. That sound is her way of saying, “This is getting hard. Please hurry up or change something.”

When I hear it, I know her emotional bandwidth is shrinking. It’s my cue to adjust, simplify the task, add reinforcement, or end the session before frustration turns into disengagement. Listening to that signal helps protect her confidence and keeps learning positive.

3. Reinforcement & Emotional Regulation

Reinforcement doesn’t just motivate behavior, it influences emotional state.

Low-value treats may work when your dog feels calm and safe. In more emotionally charged situations, higher-value food, movement, or play may be needed. 

Adolescents like Millie and Leo are often operating in a state of heightened arousal. Even low-value kibble, toy play, or simple social interaction can quickly push their excitement levels up. When reinforcement is too low, they may disengage from training altogether and go looking for something more emotionally rewarding,like people or dogs in the room.

On the flip side, when reinforcement is too high, their excitement can spike so fast that self-control falls apart. That’s when we see impulsive behaviors show up: jumping, mouthing, frantic movement, or a sudden burst of zoomies.

The goal isn’t “more motivation,” it’s emotional balance. By choosing reinforcement that helps shift arousal down instead of ramping it up, we support a calmer mindset. From there, short mini-training sessions become possible again, and learning can happen without tipping into overwhelm.

When we choose reinforcement based on how our dog feels, not just what they did, we support emotional regulation, not just compliance.

4. Misreading Emotional Signals

Dogs are constantly communicating, but their messages are often subtle.

Learning your dog’s calm body language vs their over-excited body language vs their fearful body language can help you learn how to adjust the training session to help them learn to regulate their emotional state before trying to modify behaviors.

Darya is a sweet, social dog who becomes overwhelmed easily by movement and sound,especially when that input comes from another dog. When she’s calm, Dar can focus on her humans and happily engage in familiar obedience routines. Her behavior in those moments reflects a dog who feels safe and regulated.

When another dog enters the picture, her emotional state shifts fast. What often looks like sudden “reactivity” actually starts with overload. Her arousal spikes, her focus narrows, and listening becomes impossible. While she likely wants to interact or play, she’s far too overwhelmed at that moment to make thoughtful choices.

The earliest signal that Dar is tipping over her threshold is subtle: she freezes and locks her eyes onto the other dog. That pause is the warning sign. If it’s missed, her behavior quickly escalates into intense, determined movement toward the dog; like a light switch flipping on.

This isn’t about stopping the behavior that shows up once she’s overwhelmed. It’s about recognizing the early emotional shift and installing a dimmer switch by supporting her at an arousal level where she can still think, respond, and maintain some self-control.

Look for small emotional tells:
• Changes in posture or movement
• Shifting attention or excessive sniffing
• Tight or loose body language
• Tail and ear position
• Small vocalizations or avoidance

These behaviors help you decide whether to continue, simplify, or change direction.

5. Ending Sessions with Emotional Intention

How a session ends matters just as much as how it begins.

Using a clear End of Session cue like All Done! paired with a short game or calm transition to help your dog emotionally process that the work is finished and that good things follow. 

I recommend ending every training session with a train–play–rest pattern. After working, spend 30 seconds to 3 minutes in play. That short burst helps your dog release any lingering excitement or frustration and ensures the session ends on a positive emotional note.

Once play wraps up, transition intentionally into rest. Gentle cuddling, calm connection, or belly rubs help your dog’s nervous system settle and signal that it’s safe to fully relax. This downshift is just as important as the training itself.

When we pair learning with emotional regulation, the brain can do its job. The train–play–rest rhythm supports memory consolidation, helping information move from short-term processing into long-term, usable skills. Ending well doesn’t just feel good; it helps learning stick.

Ending on a positive emotional note doesn’t mean pushing for “one more rep.” It means leaving your dog feeling safe, successful, and connected.



The Big Picture: Behavior Is Built on Emotion

Focusing on behavior means understanding the emotional foundation underneath it. When we observe and respond to our dog’s emotional state, we can:
✨ Adjust training to match emotional capacity
✨ Choose reinforcers that support regulation
✨ Prevent overwhelm before it shows up
✨ Build confidence through thoughtful endings
✨ Strengthen teamwork and trust

Training isn’t a race, it’s a conversation. February’s Focus on Behavior invites us to look beyond the surface, notice emotions as they shift, and support our dogs in ways that help them feel safe, capable, and understood.

Tuesday, January 27, 2026

Bite-Sized Lessons for Nippy Puppies

 

You Don’t Have to Struggle Alone With Puppy Nipping

February Theme: Focus on Behaviors

If you’re living with a nippy puppy, chances are you’ve had at least one moment where you thought:
“I love my dog… but this is hard.”

The constant nipping, the sharp teeth, the worry that you’re doing something wrong; it can feel exhausting and isolating. Many dog owners quietly struggle, wondering why play turns chaotic so fast or why calm moments seem so short-lived.

Here’s something important to hear:  You are not alone and your puppy is not being “bad.”

Most puppy nipping is a behavioral response, not a behavior problem. It’s how young dogs cope with excitement, frustration, overstimulation, and big emotions they don’t yet know how to manage. That’s why in our February theme is Focus on Behavior we focus on understanding what a dog is doing and why so we can change the outcome without blame or force.

Instead of asking, “How do I stop this?”
We start asking, “What is my puppy trying to communicate and what skills are missing?”

That shift changes everything.

The new Bite-Sized Lessons Mini-Class takes place February 10th - 12th!

To support dog owners through this common struggle, I created the Bite-Sized Lessons Mini-Class with short, easy-to-follow class designed to help you:

  • Understand why puppy nipping happens 
  • Respond calmly and clearly when it does 
  • Replace nipping with better behaviors 
  • Build emotional regulation skills that last beyond puppyhood

Each lesson is short on purpose. No overwhelm. No complicated training plans. Just practical guidance you can use in real life, even on hard days.

And because no one should have to navigate this alone…This mini-class is FREE for a short time. 

If you’re feeling frustrated, discouraged, or unsure of your next step, this is your invitation to pause, take a breath, and get support. Focusing on behavior, rather than labeling it as a problem, creates clarity, confidence, and calmer days for both you and your dog.

You and your puppy deserve understanding, not pressure and help that meets you where you are.

Bite-Sized Lessons with the Perfect Storm

One of the most reassuring things dog owners learn in the Bite-Sized Lessons series is this:
nipping during puppyhood and adolescence isn’t random, and it isn’t a sign that your dog is aggressive or “out of control.” It’s the result of what we call the Perfect Storm of adolescence.

Bite-Sized Lessons breaks nipping down into three overlapping forces that are all happening at once during this stage of development:

Impulsiveness: Acting Before Thinking

Adolescent puppies live very much in the moment. Their brains are still developing the ability to pause, think, and choose a different behavior. When excitement spikes (during play, leash time, or greetings) impulses take over. Nipping often happens not because the puppy wants to bite, but because they haven’t yet learned how to slow themselves down.

Bite-Sized Lessons helps owners recognize impulsive moments early and respond in ways that guide the puppy toward calmer choices.

Instant Gratification: If It Works, It Sticks

Nipping brings immediate results. Hands move, people react, play continues, or the environment changes and to a young dog, that feels rewarding. Puppies aren’t trying to be difficult; they’re simply repeating behaviors that have worked before.

In Bite-Sized Lessons, owners learn how to interrupt this cycle by making gentle, appropriate behaviors more rewarding than nipping, so new habits can take root.

An Underdeveloped Nervous System: Big Feelings, Limited Skills

Perhaps the most important piece of the puzzle is this: a puppy’s nervous system is still under construction. Emotional regulation, the ability to calm down after excitement or stress, doesn’t come fully online until later in development.

Bite-Sized Lessons emphasizes co-regulation, teaching owners how their calm, clear responses help their puppy’s nervous system settle. Instead of punishing big feelings, we focus on building the skills puppies need to handle them.

By framing nipping as a developmental “Perfect Storm,” Bite-Sized Lessons helps dog owners move away from frustration and toward understanding. When we focus on behavior, rather than labeling it as a problem, we create space for learning, growth, and a stronger relationship with our dogs.

In Bite-Sized Lessons dog owners will learn how to play games that reinforce the behavior we want while using management of the environment to prevent that challenging behavior that hurts our fingers.

When nipping has become self reinforcing or has been reinforced unintentionally, it's easy to jump to punishment and blaming the dog for causing us pain. 

In Bite-Sized Lessons we take blame out of the picture and teach dog owners how use games to reinforce taking treats nicely, keeping puppy mouths on toys (not people), and calm the internal storm that leads to more nipping.

This Mini-Class will run from February 10th-12th with a mini-zoom session at 8PM Central each day. During this zoom, the info from the day's written lesson will be presented in video format. Then we will take a moment to walk through one of the participant's personal struggles followed by a Q & A Session. 

Each zoom meeting will take roughly 30-45 minutes depending on participation. Live participation is preferred and will be most valuable to dog owners, however a recorded replay will be made available within 24 hrs of the live session. 

Spaces are limited so sign up today to save your spot!